If a Fool would but follow his folly, he would become wise. - William Blake

I once saw a guy with an ‘ANARCHY’ tattoo, waiting in line.

Now all jokes aside, here is the reason I play the Fool:

Like many in their twenties, I had a very idealistic, serious time of things, searching for black-and-white, frustrated when that simplicity was denied me. Now with ample time having past, my capacity for more shady hues of nuance has led me back to levity and light-heartedness.

There is this classic image (above) from the Major Arcana which depicts a young man, dog nipping at his heels, walking head-aloft over the edge of a cliff. He carries a small pack of his effects, and a flower in the bloom of its life.

Who could be so foolish, throwing their life away with such carelessness?

This is the whole point to me: that that which seems careless, crazy and catastrophic to some is precisely the persistence needed to change one’s life. It seems to be a bit quixotic to think that walking one’s own path leads to a fall. Still, it reminds me of a Buddhist maxim:

The bad news is you’re falling through the air with no parachute.

The good news is there’s no ground below you.

Embarking upon a fool’s errand usually attracts a fair amount of derision or dismissal. The things so patently misguided that they elicit people’s scorn is often (but not always) indicative of a promising path.

“Errand” almost sounds like “error” - there is a built-in base of missing, of being distracted and unlikely to complete the mission. (The singular Bobby Riggs - competitor in the infamous Battle of the Sexes with Billie Jean King - was remembered for his production of Err-Tight Tennis, which is that cleanly dirty type of tennis that does not allow for poor mistakes.)

A fool’s errand sounds doubly wasteful, as it suggests that success is not on offer for the pursuit. Granted, most of us succeed at our daily errands, our obligations that claim our time and resources. So I wonder then: what if we approached our personal pursuits with similar commitment, no matter how it could be received by those who do not share our purpose? There’s a subtle sense of abandon when the duty takes on this form, the feeling of “I must do this — no matter what!”

Building in a time of destruction appears to be such a Fool’s Errand. Imbued with the defeatist and nihilist mentality that many of us were raised on, the mantra “why bother?” has never been so rampant, including among those who profess to be Freedom Fighters and Truth Tellers. I’ve been ensnared for too long by the seductions of such hopelessness, mostly because it resigns my role to that of bystander, participant, someone laughing half-heartedly at the drama unfolding around me. It relieves me of agency and action — an acrimonious allure that has roots even to the myth of Jesus (“Father! If it is possible, let this cup be taken away from me!”).

The genuinely overwhelming state of affairs is - I believe - is constructed with the aim of intimidating people into defeat before the match even begins. Well-acquainted as I am with that reaction, I see latent within it that it comes from a juxtaposition of fear, someone or some entity not wishing to be pushed and challenged so that it can have its way without earning it. My gratitude for the events of 2020 and beyond is that they demanded I clarify my values, my Wills and Will-Nots, so that I could begin the building process with deeper intention.

And build I am, and build we shall… parachutes be damned!

Can't is the word that is foe to ambition,
An enemy ambushed to shatter your will;
Its prey is forever the man with a mission
And bows but to courage and patience and skill.
Hate it, with hatred that's deep and undying,
For once it is welcomed 'twill break any man;
Whatever the goal you are seeking, keep trying
And answer this demon by saying: "I can."

(from“Can’t” by Edgar Guest; taken from a book titled “Heap O’ Livin”, 1916)

There is a calamitous casuistry with which our brain insists on employing “can’t” in places it has no business rearing its ugly head. I find myself in awe of that instinct toward negative reinforcement, a reaction so immediate and habitual that I am reluctant to inculpate parental or societal conditioning.

From my own experience, some of that inner-talk veers toward the declaration that the errand is “not worth it”. With the benefit of hard-earned wisdom, I can now ask that voice: Who determines the worth/value? Not worth it to whom? for what? Is success or riches the only measure?

Is the writing of a book truly a failed effort if no one reads it? Is the singing of a song without value if it is not met with applause? Is the completion of a painting destined for the dust bin if it does not sell?

Long have we been reminded that the abilities to sing, dance and create art are inherent talents we all possess by dint of being born; they are not skills that can only be sharpened to a point of profit through schooling and grading and judgment. I can feel how we lose our essential Fool’s nature by relinquishing our rights to these pursuits, because that thief named Comparison stole our sense of unique expression.

There is the creative aspect of our lives that only Fools can pursue with reckless abandon, devoid of any expectation that their toils be rewarded by praise and power; these are anathema to a bonafide Fool. The innocence that is integral in doing-for-doing’s-sake acts as a magical ingredient, inspiring action in the face of much imagined resistance. We conjure up critics to count us out before we count ourselves in, especially in this era where we are confronted by scores of people already diluting the waters of creation with another podcast, another YouTube channel, another Substack, another, another, another …

We are a river unto ourselves, unobstructed and powerful if we choose to let it flow. As someone who has dammed his creative instincts and outlets for too long, I know the feeling of stagnation does not promote more flow. As the inimitable Neville Goddard once conveyed: it’s not about forcing the river to run, it’s about jumping into its current.

I have lost many battles with my inner-voice before the war even began, because I gave into a projection of resistance that took on the shape of impersonal spectres, multitudes of mediocrity that told me I would be wasting my time to write, to record, to challenge, to think, to listen and to do differently.

It appears - as friend and builder Topher Gardner () recently reminded me - that this is indeed an opportune time to build.

What shall we build then, as there are institutions, beliefs, relationships and egos falling into ruin around us? Replacements (and improvements) will be needed and appreciated, as simply patching and repairing will not suffice if we are to create a more beautiful world our hearts know to be possible. That is the invitation of our time: to go beyond criticism into creation.

I am so immensely grateful to the surfeit of role models in my sphere of influence who refuse to rest on the problems and are actively seeking remedies and responses to the many ills of this epoch. This requires, as I have seen, stepping outside of the consciousness that created the conditions for dis-ease and receiving the inspiration for entirely new solutions.

A certain vision is called forth, one that refuses to look at what is as the end-all, be-all, and don a new lens of possibility.

It is a vision that looks beyond the cliff’s edge, head up high, fleet afoot, proclaiming: “Adventure awaits beyond what those mountains conceal … Let me seek and find.”

Seeking, and finding. That is the challenge we face, to not only wander aimlessly, missing the mark and erring in the process. With a clear aim - specific and personal to each of us - we can erect our own targets, and hit a bullseye with a precision that surprises even ourselves…

As long as you don’t take your Self too seriously, you marvelous Fool.

Yours truly,

Tom Foolery

There is a creeping sense of cliche to say that words have power to create our reality. I feel as though I’ve gone hoarse from shouting that mantra, imploring people to sharpen their awareness of what spells they cast from their lips every time they criticize, judge, deplore or denigrate themselves or others. It is, I find, surprisingly common parlance to use acutely negative language to describe the events of our every day lives. This is a category in which ignorance appears to be the root cause rather than malice. However, ignorance can be manufactured through the assumptions that populate those shared environments in which we are reared and reprimanded to conform.

I have thoroughly been enjoying my introduction to the work of John Taylor Gatto, who provides critical historical perspective on education and literacy in America. Both education and literacy have rapidly devolved to the point of infantilism, where the ability to communicate in coherent, impactful ways is now a rarity. I choose to accept the challenge of righting that ship, because I see the necessity for wielding the power of words once more in favor of peace and prosperity. This warrants a maturation, a growth beyond ourselves and our immediate reactions, honing the ability to state our beliefs, intentions and purposes clearly; otherwise, we wail and flail to no avail.

We might come to ask: are there any systems that benefit from the stunted evolution of its people? I have spoken and written before that the glaring incentive of a system such as Western medicine is to treat sick patients for life; cures and continuous health are not good for business. Such a dependence on Mommy Medicine almost certainly guarantees that the average person will neglect the powerful influence they exact over their own health-state, and therefore, impede their ability to flourish and become an Adult.

Gatto summarizes this emphatically: “Notice what the specific mechanism is: it’s an artificial extension of childhood, theoretically to the grave … and as long as you indulge childish fears and childish appetites you’ve effectively rendered somebody harmless.” He is speaking here of the structure of Schooling, which has ulterior motives masquerading as Education.

To wit: As articulated in a lecture given by Alexander James Inglis - the inspiration for the Harvard School of Education - "The Principles of Secondary Education" (1918) describes the six elements that shaped the modern education system: Adjustive functions; Integrative (conformist) Functions; Directive Function; Differentiating Function; Selective Function; and the Propaedeutic Function.

Adjustive Function: fixed habits, a predictable disposition that responds automatically to authority; the measure of which is giving stupid orders that are accepted, usually without protest

Integrative (Conformist) Function: to make children as alike as possible, because market research requires statistical sampling that relies on generality

Directive Function: diagnosing the proper social role for a child, and to set them on that path for life

Differentiating Function: once in a given layer of social role playing, the minimum information and education is given, not any more that would invite moving beyond that role

Selective Function: a reference to Darwin’s natural selection; determining the breeding potential for children, humiliating potentially high-spirited boys and girls, encouraging the shallowness of thinking and feeling; sex-ed is to highlight sexual pleasure, intercourse as the peak of relating, not the immaterial that makes it all worthwhile

Propaedeutic Function: from the Greek, ‘to teach beforehand’; perpetuating the idea of favored races; improving the breeding stock by separating the ones with bad grades, remedial placement, “behavior problems”; a predictive function to steer the mating pool in certain currents

The reader may notice a missing ingredient in this indigestible dish: the learning function.

I think education is not something received, but something taken. I have long said that my education began in earnest the day I left college. Over the last seven years or so, my genuine intellectual curiosities (G.I.C.) seamlessly led me to study philosophy, language, history, health, movement, astrology, and law. The fruits of a self-guided education have required toil and investment, without the external stimuli to which I was so accustomed. Those outside forces can greatly arrest the faculties of organic curiosity.

My core message in this essay is this: learning is distinct from schooling. Schooling connotes all the mess described above, with the social engineering and peer pressure, that demand memorization of facts as opposed to an inquisitive and interested nature. There is a chasm between memorization and understanding, between memory itself and the ability to execute. In tennis, you might have memorized the technique on a high volley, but to execute down break point in an important match is another matter entirely…

Learning is a resilience to move forward, to build new paths on which we can trek into an unknown yet more promising future, not limited by “this is how it’s always been”. From my experience, there is a fragility that comes from being schooled in such stringent conditions. The expectation that the “right” (“correct”, “factual”, “true”, etc.) information will be disseminated by someone with lots of answers but an intolerance for questions is one of the most egregious examples of out-sourcing our innate powers that nurture perception, problem-solving, and therefore, resilience.

Ostensibly, there is a similar sense of frailty that is based in the constant dis-regulation of one’s nervous system in most school settings: lack of movement, bad lighting, stifling bodily urges for relief, forced concentration, to name a few. On paper, these features of the environment seem more akin to basic training than a school for kids to grow, sourced primarily from the Prussian military paradigm for producing obedient and uniform soldiers. I wonder if parents really intend for their children to be molded into soldiers, or if they would prefer them to be Human Beings. Though I am not yet a father, I know where I stand.

I asked someone recently, “Do you think school is a place for kids to flourish?” The idea that flourishing was even on the table was a bit startling, even as it occurred to me. But isn’t that what childhood is supposed to be all about? The burst of life, the accelerated growth that comes from experience, trial and error, the bounce-back that most children find is their natural way of being. I see it as a tall order for a tree to grow tall and strong, if there is a ceiling over its head.

Another significant factor in the bewildering experience of boarding a school bus and being banished from home for years on end is the abuse of logical fallacies. (This site is a superb resource for better understanding logical fallacies.) Appeal to authority, appeal to emotion, begging the question, bandwagon, false dichotomy. If a curious child should be so brazen as to ask, “How do you know that?”, they are almost always met with a logical fallacy; to say “I actually don’t know for sure” is anathema to most of us, let alone someone expected to deliver answers, rationale and reasons professionally. Yes, knowledge as we know is a moving target, so there is a wide berth for all of us in the earnest pursuit of more experience and awareness. I also trust that most teachers do their best to enlighten rather than darken the mental faculties of their pupils. Still, we suffer collectively from the assumption that most of our world is solved - or solvable - and all that is left is to print the findings in a textbook, test people, and sort out the non-believers from there. For all the valid criticisms of religious fanaticism, the ranks of education are populated with cult-like leaders, administrators, and followers, swept up in the currents of go-along-to-get-along, closely resembling the church-goers they so openly mock.

Since it is the fashion of our time to reduce everything “down to a science”, that should put Science under the microscope. The field of science itself has a neurotic obsession with claiming unconditional certainty over a vast many subjects, many of which are simply stories stacked upon assumptions based upon conjecture - even Albert Einstein conceded as much, acknowledging the essence of theorizing as story-telling. This, regrettably, leaves little room for “non-believers”, and further supports the rigidity of systems that, without a good old fashioned stretch every once in awhile, leads to atrophy and degeneration. Inflexibility is what creates stagnation; stagnation leads to disease and death. All systems are alive if populated by people, so any system which refuses to adapt, grow, recognize error and improve, is destined for a steep decline. Science has staked its claim in mechanization and anti-life philosophies, so I do not take my guidance from that pulpit anymore.

This essay in its current iteration is not meant to expose the myriad myths that are propagated in the walls and halls of the average school (more on these later). As a self-proclaimed history buff, I have had to reckon with the scars from my AP European History course in which my skepticism on numerous multiple choice exams was met with vehement denouncement and less-than-excellent marks. Since my interest was not extinguished, the fire remains to this day, and I continue to un-learn many false narratives that have shaped our understanding of the “right side of history”, as if History has a side. For now, just consider the Civil War (also known as the War of Northern Aggression), as an example: almost unilaterally, it is taught as a war fought over the issue of slavery. Any precursory internet search now would reveal that the conflict had much more to do with debt and monetary policies, foreign interests, and social engineering that turned Americans into industrialists rather than entrepreneurs. This alone is cause to question the way people view themselves and their place in time.

And so, we find ourselves in the Present, a Gift if there ever was one.

The most confronting question at hand is: Is it working? Or, to pull from Native American lore, the exactitude of this question is really: Does it grow corn? If you salt the ground where the corn is meant to grow, the crop dies. If, however, you douse the rows of plantings with glyphosate, the corn will still grow, but it is likely to carry within itself a subtle toxicity for whomever consumes it. So one might say that, yes of course the school system is producing flourishing children, well-adjusted and ready to change the world! Look how tall those stalks of corn have grown!

Well, I would ask: how can one change the world when reared inside the very system that ensures compliance and obedience to the ones dependent on things remaining the same? How can you produce toxic food and still claim that it will nourish the world? From my perspective, these rhetorical questions reveal the dwindling vitality of children, as generations enter the ranks of their local prisons schools and emerge as vulnerable victims to be sacrificed at the altar of the status quo. My vocation in this Life is to support vitality, and that has led me to understanding topics such as natural law, money, social engineering and education, because I see how early the assault on the life-force begins.

The resilience derived from un-learning so much of what has been foisted upon us is indescribably liberating. I have found the greatest transformations in my life have come from relinquishing what I thought I knew (really, believed) and stepping into a new story, one that usually has much more color than the previous black-and-white version. No classroom, no authority figure required. Simply an open heart and mind and voracious hunger for Truth will suffice for the rest of this journey.

Yours Truly,

Tom Foolery

Writers are encouraged to write about what they know and what they love. My instinct to write about health is the most compelling one, especially as I know my experience is connected to the web of Healing that is going on right now, in unique and universal ways.

As I believe that a healthy body is a sensitive body, my acute symptomatic expressions serve as stark reminders to visit my Inner World as a faithful practice. To snooze these reminders is to invite chronic stagnation, blockages of energy that turn current discomfort into prolonged crises. We know these crises by many names - cancer, auto-immune, chronic fatigue, arthritis, etc. - though the origin stories are as diverse as the people who live them.

I have learned to adopt an attitude of gratitude in meeting my symptoms, because even though I may still slip into doubt about the brilliance of my body, there is a calming trust that allays my anxiety, summarized by one mantra: The Body does not make mistakes.

Your body has never made a mistake. Not once. Every pain, every symptom, every malady is in response to your Terrain, which includes all around you and all that you allow into the inner sanctum. I have long said that the impulse to fix, remedy, suppress or otherwise expedite the expression of symptoms is so we can get back to work, get back to life, and resume everything that we were doing before. In our haste, we run the risk of neglecting any and all signposts en route to our new destination, because there is no “going back to the way I was before” … there is only ONWARD.

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The gut checks I receive are reliably timely, useful and all ways in my favor.

When this set of symptoms first presented, I assumed it was poison ivy: I had been galavanting around my property recently, and have learned the hard way that poison ivy oils do not fully slumber in the Winter. The rash turned into a weepy, swollen presence on my extremities, which was uncomfortable but not unfamiliar. Some progress followed, if slow, and I was resigned to some poison ivy soap and the occasional bandage to cover the rash while playing tennis.

By the second week, as the spread continued and progress took the form of a moving target, I became concerned - curious, but concerned. The symptoms that now appeared were bumpy, dry, raw, and unlike anything I could recall experiencing… although it moved across my trunk, my neck, my armpits, almost every part of my body, I was hopeful by the consistent movement.

I have written before about the significance of the skin: it is our boundary, exemplifying and amplifying the sense of connection (or lost connection) that we feel when in close proximity to people in relationship, as well as the necessary separateness that allows our full expression of Self. My mental spiral started to pursue that line of questioning: where am I feeling abandoned? where do I feel infiltrated or vulnerable in my boundary-setting? where is my will-not-power being challenged? These self-inquiries were dizzying, and admittedly, I was so distracted as to not follow them to any conclusion.

This in and of itself was revelatory: if the rising action in the story of health-life is unclear, then a surrender is required, so as to depend entirely on the logical faculties that can lead us astray as often as they can clearly direct. Thinking less is still better than not thinking at all, so I trusted the road I was on that was detouring into presence, feeling, acceptance…

That phase of the healing process was a fair challenge. Physically, the sensations ranged from general discomfort to fleeting agony, as the heaviness and heat of my skin made me constantly aware that not only was I borderline reptilian in appearance, but I was also out-of-ease (aka dis-eased), a shot to my “image” as a health coach. Still, I could not let my Ego take control of the situation, because that is where despair and more dis-ease can poison the waters. Instead, I chose once again to surrender, to accept my present condition as a requisite for ultimate recovery.

After reflecting on the suppressive methods which, for at least two-thirds of my life, had been the go-to intervention, the present moment seemed to align naturally with the trajectory of my health story. With a Terrain lens, I now see the folly in that conventional approach, because it is so quick to rob the riches of wisdom that come from such lessons the Pain Teacher wishes to deliver, with creams and oral medications injected as quickly as possible to mitigate any sensation of pain.

On a technical level, suppression acutely and aggressively pushes whatever bile, toxins, mucus, damaged tissue etc. that is on top (e.g. rash on skin) deeper into the tissues of the body, under the skin, into organs, so that what comes next is likely to be chronic. On an emotional level, this creates a stagnation, a dam that prohibits the flow of Life Fore, qi, water and electricity that is our natural state.

The Six-Phase Table of Homotoxicology (presented below) gives a summary breakdown of the transitions that the body cycles through when sufficient drainage, detox and clearing are out of balance.

From Energique.com:

The best way to conceptualize homotoxicology is adding depth to drainage, allowing for an even more targeted approach to drainage therapy. If the body can be visualized as a two-dimensional map, it makes sense that drainage therapy should be targeted towards the specific organs or tissues that seem most affected. Homotoxicology adds a third dimension, specifically addressing how deeply the toxins are entrenched and by what mechanisms they need to be eliminated, as these are the mechanisms that a well-selected drainage remedy aims to stimulate.

The original theory developed by German homeopath Dr. Hans-Heinrich Reckeweg identified six phases of toxicosis, in other words six layers of depth which accumulated toxins may penetrate and from which they would need to be dislodged. For instance, mechanisms like salivation and perspiration may be enough to remove mercury from the bloodstream but may not be sufficient to eliminate it from the bones and nervous system. In homotoxicology, drainage remedies are chosen to support whole-body elimination at different levels of penetration, promoting the metabolic and eliminative processes necessary to address that layer and in this way, assist in moving even deeply held toxins out of the body.

My gratitude for the Terrain Philosophy and its abundant advocates gains every time I confront my personal problems, problems that have solutions embedded into them.

The most frustrating hurdle came when I began experiencing lymph-node backup, with spots in my groin, behind my knees, in my neck, and in my armpits becoming swollen and sensitive. Even my calves began to swell - and even as someone who long desired more muscular calves, this was not a compromise I was willing to accept. The result was that at bedtime, I would begin feeling little pin-pricks right when I was falling asleep, which turned into itching and slapping by way of relief. This cost me three consecutive nights of sleep, which is generally regarded as grounds for insanity.

A thought flashed through my mind, though: "What if this lymph stagnation goes on for WEEKS?!” I so often criticize those who attempt to predict the future, that I had to chide myself a bit for being so quick to let fear dictate my vision. And still: I noted the rapidity with which my rash progressed into different locations, inflaming then drying then flaking, and so I did not despair. My reptilian regeneration was fully underway, and impeccably times, as the Year of the Snake was drawing to its close.

As it turned out, the hardest thing to do was the easiest thing to do: NOTHING.

Yes there were hot baths, breathing practices, hydration consistency, nourishing foods, mental disciplines, and other daily devotions that kept my energy from fragmenting. What I mean is that no medical intervention was used: no herb, no supplement, no special tea. No-Thingness is a powerful medicine in and of itself, as I learned many years ago from studying the philosophy of Bruce Lee.

How can we understand what is happening to us or for us, if our inner world is under duress from constant noise, by way of digestion, obligations, expectations, stressors, or literal noise from speakers or ear buds? The “too-many-apps-running” metaphor is a good one: if our bio-battery is being taxed by a host of programs all running at once, we will be hard-pressed to direct our awareness to the place it is most needed.

As I write this, I am becoming more aware than ever of the necessity for un-plugging, and allowing for the quiet to inform my experience. Truly there is no quiet because we are constantly buzzing, vibrating with charge as our Life evolves subtly. My own habits for stimulation have clouded my judgment and my ability to respond rather than react.

Inspired by my memorable conversation with Liev Dalton (/Beyond Terrain), I am reminded of a simple guiding principle: Worry is a prayer for the things we do not want. To worry about one’s health is to trap energy, to stagnate, feeling more and more claustrophobic as the walls of an Anxiety Prison close in about our Self.

When I say that the hardest thing to do was the easiest thing to do, the only hard part was the Doubt. Shouldn’t I do some-thing? Hasn’t this gone on long enough? Why can’t I be 100% already? Isn’t this how bigger issues are created? All valid questions, to a point, because they are being guided by worry instead of resolution.

I am fairly certain that the snake does not quiver and quake when it begins to shed its skin. Perhaps it sighs, and hisses to itself, “Aaahhh … it’s time.” Acknowledging the timing of this upgrade for my health, my resignation came with a nod toward the brilliance of my body… How fitting that I should enter into a new year, a new season of my Life, with a fresh suit of armor, as I charge into new adventures.

This is not exclusive to skin issues or to my own circumstances. Our collective transformation is ever-present, as cells, tissues and organs all regenerate without our coaxing them to do so, keeping us in flow with the instinct to renew and grow. Fear and doubt are toxins that impede these effortless processes, latching onto our more powerful, positive energies that would otherwise keep us beautifully balanced at all times.

None of us is immune from the necessity to clear our field in some form another. The challenge lies in our sense of trust in the body, the Terrain, and Divine Timing. A worthy challenge, I can now say from experience.

Who do you feel like you are becoming, as we gallop into the Year of the Fire Horse?

A new adventure awaits … you can have a new sword, lance and shield at your disposal, if you accept the gifts given by the Pain Teacher.

Yours truly,

Tom Foolery

This isn’t a cry for help, since I’m rather enjoying myself.

It feels often times enlivening, and other times maddening … all ways, it feels like a dynamic life. The most relevant revelation has been that constant motion - inward and downward, upward and outward - is the most potent signal that I am living my life in an active, responsive way, rejecting auto-pilot in favor of authorship.

Usually when we say someone is deemed to be spiraling, the oft-unspoken-and-assumed suffix to that sentiment is:“out of control”. Although, this begs the question - what is so desirable about control anyway?

If any illusions exist in this realm, Control ranks among the top.

“Control yourself!”

“Control your emotions!”

“Have some self-control!”

All familiar admonishments in most households, schools and churches, which is like yelling at the TV to change the channel when the remote is in another house. How often are we truly the gatekeeper of our thoughts, feelings, reactions and responses? Where can we locate the faulty filter that seems to let in so many undesirables into the confines of our minds?

This is not meant to be a piece on Consciousness. (For that, I direct you to the work done by friend of the show, Mark Gober, in his “Where is My Mind?” podcast series). I credit the peerless Novak Djokovic for speaking so openly about his transition from “Only think positive thoughts!” to the realization that thoughts will populate our experience without our control, and therefore, we are tasked with transmuting them, transforming them from their raw state into a version more useful to our desires. This is pivotal in tennis, where the margins between victory and defeat are so narrow, that any point can turn into a massive momentum swing if the mental game is not guided toward timely practices of forgiveness, grace, confidence and focus. Such humility can also benefit us in our games we play off the court.

Granted, at the risk of overstating the obvious, I believe we are indeed called to assume response-ability for what comes after the recognition of a charged emotion or thought. I refer to this as The Catch: the moment you realize that you are choosing to be less than your best by succumbing to the temptation of being hurtful, victimized or otherwise out of alignment with what you know to be heart-centered responses. The Catch can be immediate or delayed by hours or days… the Good Work is then making amends - within and without - not for losing control, but for missing the mark with our choices. Spirals can be created when we are unsure of what feels like the right repair, and then, the adventure begins.

While I do regularly allude to powers-that-should-not-be, the Parasite Class, and the unique collection of pedophiles and wanna-be tyrants that purport to be powerful, my perception is that they have foregone True Power for the smokescreen of control. They panic when that facade is challenged, they rage when that deception is revealed, and they quiver when power is assumed from within ourselves - these are the hallmark events of the post-2020 era.

The level of control exhibited by those systemic lever-pullers is granted chiefly through another c-word: Consent.

consent, (intrans. verb): to permit, approve, or agree; comply or yield

The yielding and compliance are the complicating aspects of this word, this communal experience, because it suggests a lack of courage or fortitude. Still, I believe we all agree to yield instead of all-ways dominating and swerving recklessly into the paths of others, and thus our assent (agreement) is granted for others to do as they please, not as we might prefer. This does not excuse or condone the willful ignorance to quietly allow the comfortable constraints of tyranny to reign over reason, truth, love and Natural law in favor of keeping the waters calm (again - as if we had any control over how the waters move!).

We become straight lines, rigid and pointed in a single direction, when we adopt compliance and yielding as the default position for navigating this world. Not wanting to disturb the streams around us, we settle for the still waters of conformity by believing that spiraling is something characteristic of the unhinged and deranged among us. I assert that riding the inner maelstrom of feeling is our divine gift as Human Beings, to realize that we all possess the capacity and latent aptitude to spiral intentionally, unlocking potential for thinking, moving and perceiving differently than ever before.

Coiling, spiraling, torquing … all of these terms and their athletic connotations refer to the holistic system of body movement known as spiral dynamics. Spiral dynamic systems connect multiple muscle groups, enabling whole-body movements. These patterns are fundamental to activities requiring coordination, such as throwing a ball, swinging a golf club, or performing daily tasks like shoveling snow or exiting a car.

Our human body is built with structures that naturally follow spiral patterns. Muscles and connective tissues are organized diagonally or in spiral formations across the body, such as the spiral line in the fascial system. When we walk, run, or throw, these muscles and joints move in spirals, creating balance, strength, and efficiency.

Spiral movements are biomechanically-speaking highly efficient, distributing force and tension more evenly across the body. For example: when throwing a ball, the body rotates and spirals through the hips, spine, and shoulder to generate maximum power while minimizing the risk of injury, all from the ground up (and out). These spirals allow for fluid and dynamic motion, making them crucial for sports, dance, and other physical activities. So much of this ballistic movement is dependent on functional joint complexes. Joints such as the shoulder and hip naturally move in spiral patterns due to their ball-and-socket design, allowing rotation and movement across multiple planes. The spine, for instance, twists in a spiral when we rotate the torso, supporting both stability and range of motion.

The image above is indicative of an intelligence that is at our fingertips - or, in this case, is located at the palm and bottoms of our feet. These lines intertwine in a web of fluid electricity that we refer to as Fascia, supporting truly fluid, effortless movement. These interconnections can be called Fascia lines and can be followed by the body’s dissectible “meridians” of connective tissue structures. They consist of membranes and ligaments, both superficial and deep connective tissue, loose and tight. These Fascia lines create stability, resistance, power, flexibility, elasticity, synchronously and brilliantly. Connective tissue structures work in sync, creating a fluid and balanced movement and a posture that maintains balance and direct contact between all body parts … all of this without our conscious direction.

However, the modern obsession with gym-specific movements, usually involving barbells, are dedicated to the development of muscle, a product. This innate system of spiraling and balletic movement is an alternative that prioritizes function over form, with the former supporting the latter; as we know, an abundance of muscle rarely confers beautiful movement skills. And so, I find myself spreading the Gospel of Good Form to enhance the expanding understanding that are undeniably designed to move AND feel better than our current environment suggests.

More on this at a later time… for now, suffice it to say that a gauntlet has been thrown down: find the spiral in your walking movement from this day forth.

So then - what is the best part of spiraling, you’re impatiently wondering?

From experience, being cast into the vortex of inner awareness and the pitfalls therein has revealed more than it has confused. Such is the nature of adventure, that we dive in, pray for deliverance and, willingly or otherwise, ride the waves.

My previous reflections on the Pain Teacher and the lessons that came through have confirmed for me that some level of suffering or disturbance is a necessity for shifting our posture - physically and spiritually - toward the Center. This is the stability, the stillness around which we spiral, and the place we return to when madness seems to reign.

To spiral is to move with an inner grace that looks like chaos, guided by a magnetic pull back to the center of being, hardly knowing what time it is or where the finish line may be located. As Cervantes declared centuries ago: “The road is better than the inn.” Hard to imagine when we become so hellbent on getting precisely where we are going, with the arrogant certainty that permits little room for fluctuation and perturbation, which are known to some as the pivot points of our lives.

This is the essence of my reflection here: that feeling out of control, off of center, is an invitation to do things differently. When the road seems to move from beneath our feet, the answer is not to white-knuckle the steering wheel as it rattles in our sweaty palms. Counter-intuitive, yes, but only because we have inherited the culture of control that insists - from science to medicine to school on down to family - that emphatically insists, “We know best; Nature is confused and mistaken.” I eschew such an idea because mystery is the paramount invitation for intuition, which can only take place inside each of us.

And inside, there is only room for One.

Yours truly,

Tom Foolery

Such was the case recently, as I spent the majority of August with an inflamed throat, hoarse, dry coughing, and regularly without any volume to my voice above a whisper or murmur. I have no other experience with which I can compare this prolonged symptomatic incident, and after roughly three weeks, a growing concern started to emerge: do I have what it takes to resolve this myself?

I joke with people that I am more often heard before I am seen - which is quite true, if you know my penchant for projecting my voice. So, as a man who values his voice - to sing, to speak, to jest, to podcast, to teach, to connect - it was supremely humbling to be without my most valuable tool for weeks on end.

The perspective that I have come to embrace over recent years in the face of any ailment is one of Curiosity. From this position, one can feel motivated to direct a drama in the spirit of a Sherlock Holmes: investigating the hows and whys in one’s healing journey, coupled with the useful police report (who/what/when/where) for revealing the origins of any malady. Otherwise, it is quite easy for despair to set in amidst the confusion of wondering how and why this happened to poor little old me?!

The complementary paradigms of German New Medicine and Homeopathy are rooted in this search for inner-clarity through a steady diet of questions. Weighing all of one’s self on the scales of Life is no small task, and it is one we rarely undertake unless faced with injury or issue to our health. I say that honestly, because we all assume we are “in good shape” so long as we do not acknowledge the habits and harbingers of dis-ease that slow us down. Such has been my feeling until the Pain Teacher visits with another timely lesson, and prompts a new track of internal investigation to commence in earnest.

The questions we ask our emotional-body become pivotal in supporting the physical-body’s brilliant response to healing. And yet, there is sharpness to the scalpel of personal inquiry, which is the fine edge of Judgment. It is part of my disposition - conditioned or otherwise - to assume both blame and responsibility, in a dedicated effort to achieve Freedom through radical accountability. What that can lead to in moments such as these is thinking some repetitive version of, “What did I do to bring this on myself?” Even now I can see the utility in that approach, seeking an answer from within that makes me the central figure of the story, tasked with the vindication of whatever misadventure I encountered. Still, it can be a burden to condemn one’s self as the perpetrator and “victim”.

Choosing to view dis-ease through the lens of “What is wrong with me / my body?” is a murky medium, especially as it presumes error and fault, where I believe there is none. There is a comfort, a peace that is omnipresent when we accept the infinitely intelligent design of our anatomy, that is reliably moving our blood, digesting our food, circulating our air, hydrating our cells, and generally speaking, doing a stellar job of keeping us alive without our effort. So, bravo Body! And yet, whenever discomfort arises, we are conditioned to blame and berate our capricious “meat-suit” (a new-age term I detest!) and bemoan our fate as victims of viruses or trauma or bad genetics, the operative word here being “victims”. We drink from the poison tap of Chronic Stress when our mind turns to victim consciousness, harboring a belief that we are at the mercy of a vindictive deity under our skin that is punishing us for not getting enough sleep or eating poorly or any of those cliches people employ to say, “This is my body telling me I need to slow down.” True, it is a signal, and yet it is not some abrupt red-light that you didn’t see as you barreled down the road to your next appointment. That signal is usually far more subtle and consistent, unbeknownst to the average awareness.

My initial approach to heightening my own awareness in this matter was truth-seeking, especially when I looked into the significance of the Throat as the locus of expression, communication, truth-telling. I began to wonder: Where have I deceived myself or others through poor languaging? Have I changed my truth as it leaves my mouth to make someone else feel better? Have I felt unheard, or even unsafe in fully expressing myself? Unpleasant and uncomfortable questions, to be sure, and also profoundly productive in prioritizing clarity of speech, particularly in my role as a steward of information through coaching, teaching and podcasting. With each day I challenged myself to be as ruthlessly responsive as possible to my own reflections. With each day passed, this did not produce my desired outcome of having my voice back in full force.

I turned humbly and hopefully to homeopathic remedies. I am deeply grateful for my connection with Lisa Strbac, who has made homeopathic and tissue salt remedies comprehensible to any and all seekers through her user-guide style of books, which we highlighted in this podcast:

As I leafed through the dozen-or-so potential remedies that matched my symptoms, I was compelled to consider yet another arc of healing: what and why is my body expressing through these symptoms NOW? It made a tremendous difference to have an amateur’s anthology of emotional and physical realities to convey my current circumstances, as if they were guideposts on a road I’d never traveled, installed by a future version of myself. I personally recommend Lisa’s book and first-aid kit for home usage for these very reasons.

The energetic elements of Homeopathy are maintained by the consciousness and memory of Water, which is to say that despite the dilution of the substances used in the remedies, they retain an energetic signature, much like one turning fork setting another into vibration. This imprint is believed to act on the body’s energetic field (or emotional body), prompting self-regulation and healing. On the physical front, this promotes the body’s innate responses to healing by way of symptoms, come what may; on the emotional front, this means that stifled emotions buoy to the surface to avoid the deleterious effects of suppression and denial. It is a true supplement insofar as it supports the full expression of the body, without suppression. Homeopathy honors the belief that a cycle must be completed so that it does not repeat deeper and worse than before.

As I began to plug-and-play with different remedies, I observed a growing irritability, which I chalked up to my discontentment over this prolonged bout of bothersome dis-ease. I had a marked improvement for a short spell, as the inflammation in my throat dissipated and some of the bass in my voice returned, yet due to the oratorial nature of my work, there could be no rest for the woebegone and weary. It took a disciplined commitment to consistently remind myself - and those concerned people who told me to go see a doctor - that sickness, like healing, is never purely physical. Many of those concerned people urged me to seek medical advice. How could I invite the advice of a physician who would not begin to access my inner-being, the part of me that would generate the return to homeostasis once I finally homed in on the ever-elusive root cause? Who could I trust to heal me, other than Me? This is not to say that I do not value the insights of Guides altogether. Rather, it begins and ends with my Self to determine what is useful wisdom and what is useless distraction.

One of the guiding principles of homeopathic intervention is to cease giving remedies once improvement begins, the antithesis of the regimen for allopathic treatments like antibiotics. Due to my impatience, I did not honor this standard. So when I foolishly tried to force the timeline of restoration, I reached yet another disheartening plateau. For all my optimism, there was a 48-hours period where I would find myself on the verge of tears, choked up by an unspoken grief, at random intervals throughout the day. My reaction was to acknowledge the overwhelming weight of not being able to fully share my abundant energy through my voice, to cheer in excitement or sing with gusto or laugh heartily; there was an exhaustion that had come over me because of this handicap, this limit on my boundless desire to connect through conversation. However, I was able to right the ship by realizing that I was experiencing an energetic shift courtesy of the remedy I had chosen to reify my healing, and that this was something worthy of keen introspection.

I paused the remedy intake, and decided one night to take a long, hot bath, in darkness…

It is remarkable what is revealed during a silent sweat session. While I lowered myself into that near-scalding tub of water with an intention to discover the root-cause of this initiation, the answer was already bubbling to the surface:

Earlier in the month, during a visit with beloved family friends, I learned of something that involved a family member and a bit of business being conducted. This revelation, at that time and even now, is truly hard to swallow. (My love later informed me that, upon the delivery of this news, there was a stark silence where no one spoke for a few beats, least of all me, who usually has something to say.) Despite all of the rational, logical context that my left-brain used to downplay the situation, I could no longer avoid the reality of my situation: I was startled, stifled and saddened by the situation. With nothing to say, a lump in my throat, and no outlet for expressing my side of the story, I was left mute and mad as hell.

As I simmered in the bath, I let my heart do more of the talking. The tone of the heart is tender and full of personal wisdom. My heart acknowledged the hurt, the frustration borne of futility when I felt I could not adequately express my truth to this let-down. For all the time I spent avoiding this seemingly innocuous event - because this had happened before, it was to be expected, I was also at fault, etc. - I failed to dig deep enough down to discover a fundamental reality of emotional health: we feel deeper than we think. Thanks to the guidance of German New Medicine in particular, my search for an event that took my breath away and/or muted me shed light on my situation enough to turn the tides, and not just in the bath tub…

Within a day or two, as the spring in my step returned, so did the vibrations of my voice. The awareness alone was supremely liberating, because I knew that I had visited the origin of this health initiation, and returned to the World more resilient than before. One remaining hurdle, however, was the recovery time. With weeks of voicelessness in my rearview mirror, I assumed that a similar amount of time would be required for my convalescence. When I voiced this to my love, she replied in her brand of brilliance, “Why would you limit yourself with that belief?”

Well, thank God she said that, because that is precisely what that hurdle was: a heavily limiting belief, and one that did not belong in my arc of healing. Brushing aside my own defensive response, surrendering to the inherent intelligence woven into that question, I returned to a mantra I had heard some years before: “My body is self-healing and self-regenerating.” Armed with that perspective, each day brought about longer strides toward strength.

At the time when I began writing this essay, I was not fully recovered, and felt that perhaps I was jumping the gun. I paused, hemmed and hawed, doubting my own story. Now, concluding this essay, many weeks removed from the inciting event, I have been singing and shouting and podcasting to my heart’s content. Furthermore, to the people who I coached over the weeks when I was less than my best, I have happily shared my experience to emphasize the spiritual-emotional work required for true healing to occur seamlessly, peacefully, without chemical or unnatural intervention.

Why do I refer to this as a “health initiation”? The Mystery Schools, and countless clubs, groups, fraternities, etc. required an ordeal to test the character of any would-be member to enter their ranks. Here in Earth School, with the myriad lessons we are tasked with learning for ourselves from a deep roster of teachers, I believe that each confrontation with dis-ease is such an ordeal. I was called upon to test my own values about self-healing, natural healing, root cause investigation, spiritual fortitude, patience and grace. I’m not sure what grade the Pain Teacher will give me, but I know that in the end, I passed.

I look back on the passage of this time with a wry smile and full heart, knowing well that we are at our best when we trust in simple solutions of Self. The answers and keys truly lie within, if we are willing to enter the darkness, searching until we find that for which we are hunting so earnestly. That will differ for each and all of us …

I wish you more than good luck on your next journey from your head to your heart.

Yours truly,

Tom Foolery

It could be because many of us had our adolescent prison sentence temporarily commuted (yes, I’m alluding to school again!)… or perhaps because it meant special excursions to far off lands … or maybe this was the season when you reconnected with family and special friends … or you remember that your favorite foods suddenly became more delicious and available again!

Whatever our reasons for the seasons, I find Summer to be a uniquely fascinating blend of activity and leisure. The abundance of energy - sun, heat, time - makes Summertime a splendid playground, especially in how it delivers us from the throes of Winter (and even Spring) in New England. And with school no longer in session - except for you alleged “slow-learners”, formerly known as retards - the schedules shift, the lack of obligation leading to some more lazy days of sauntering and sweating around town.

And now, speaking for my Self as only I can do, I find that my focus on Seasons - as opposed to “time”, dates, calendars, history etc. - has brought much more awareness to the changes in my life. Sometimes they are quite actually hourly or daily changes, unfolding on the micro as one stitch becomes a block becomes a sweater; other times, I turn my thoughts backward in awe at the strides or stumbles I’ve taken. I was alerted recently to the experience of Time as only ever the Present: it is not about the date, or day of the week, or “ in the year of our Lord!” or anything like that, all constructs by Man that are not accepted by all Men … Time is all about Today, and the import of this gift known as the Present, the only reality we have to inhabit. Still, the elements in the environment to change, sometimes overtly, and other times so subtly that we are clueless to the most dynamic events of our lives. Such is the nature of Nature…

I am reminded of a poem woven into the fabric of the Japanese samurai novel Musashi:

When I am busy, the mountain looks at me. When I am at leisure, I look at the mountain. Though it seems the same, it is not the same, For busyness is inferior to leisure.

Upon reading this and removing the metaphorical arrow through my heart, I wrote in a little journal: “How will I ever know if the mountain face is changing: smiling or frowning, young or old?” Tracking the changes of mountain landscapes is one thing, but I was touching the roots of a deeper question to explore…

This once again resonates deeply with my feeling lately of navigating the intense push toward heightened activity in the Summer, and the subtle pull toward refreshment. My own fascination with Eastern cultures leads me to believe that there is (or was) an appreciation for both hard work and quality leisure. A further teaching that derives from the history-culture-religion triad is the Christian creation story, wherein Rest itself is an established part of the cycle, not a token reward for Work, but rather an element that complements the Creative initiative.

Should we lose the sense of leisure as a necessity for exertion, we are vulnerable to the incessant pressure of the Achievement Society in which we currently exist… then, the debt of obligation, commitment, perceived lack of choice, all contribute to the common feeling of burn-out. (As I have shared before: hard work does not beget more hard work; it red-lines and sputters and falters and stops.)

In my podcast conversation with pioneering speed coach Tony Holler, I became further convinced of the immense benefits that derive from doing highly-active tasks (such as sprinting at full speed) a few times, really well, for minimal time, to gain maximal advantage. This is diametrically opposed to the Sacred Cows of endurance training for “mental toughness” and running sprints so that a team is “not tired at the end of the match” - which, sadly, over time degrades the quality and ability of movers.

One tangential concept in training is prioritizing force production over power: how often and how well you can repeat explosive action, versus doing it once with max effort. Are the actions of our lives one power move after another, or a sustainable marathon of starts and stops, looping into greater depths? (You can guess my rhetorical answer based on this thread…) There are some paths that run parallel in our lives, mirroring both our movement and our stillness.

To house our spirit, the foundations must be strong in order fully express one’s self in the yin-yang spiral of being alive. Rest and recovery have variable meanings to each and every person who is striving in their own directions. We all work in different capacities, too, but the degree of our effort does not make someone more or less deserving of the space to recuperate. (I like to remind me people on the tennis court that no matter how hard they work, if the ball still won’t go in, I will still support and encourage them!) I encounter a lot more people who think they know the meaning of ‘work’, but think ‘rest’ is a curse-word.

Imagine if all you did was drive your car: literally all gas, no breaks, no stops, no re-fills, no maintenance. Just point A to point B, without much awareness for what goes on beyond the windows and A/C. There are similar stretches for the one body that you have: from task to task, work to work, failing to account for the revolving change in cycles of days, weeks, seasons of our lives… it is easy to live on auto-pilot, and “easy” quite often leads to “hard”. Work - and life - are hard enough without the balance of rest, so do not neglect your need to commune with the quieter side of You, which asks for fewer inputs, less signaling, more stillness.

The Summer, despite its intensities, invites us to prepare for the Work of an upcoming Harvest, where though the days are shorter, we must make hay and hustle! The perpetuity of precious time means that not all days are the same; we are granted that magical novelty when we choose to create a life of Authority and Self-Authorship, not a passive, submissive assignment to subsist without resetting from time to time.

Wherever you find deep comfort, solace, nourishment - may you visit that place in your inner or outer world on a regular schedule.

(Meetings with your Self are always the most exciting, any way - don’t you think so?)

Sincerely,

Tom Foolery

The Terrain Philosophy of Health is the most beautiful perspective for inner-standing my experience of reality on several planes. It encourages intimate awareness of our environment - which is vast and variable - in order to manage the core calibrators of physicality, such as pH balance, function of tissues and organs, regeneration and ease of being. With a fluid, electrically-charged environ, this is sustainable; with toxic interference, a host of blockages can crop up.

This composition today is dedicated to the relationship we all have with Stress, largely influenced by toxic substances and feelings that disrupt a balanced terrain. A holistic view of Health provides the tools to construct a refreshed inner and outer feeling of true vitality, even in the midst of overwhelming anti-life distractions.

The Terrain is beyond physical. There are multiple factors of our mere existence that are impacting our every moment. Most notably, the emotional and spiritual factors significantly impact the body in tangible manifestation. For now, the focus on our physical Terrain must suffice for this piece …

Here You Can Read About: a new perspective on immune systems, the scope of toxic overload, balancing the Terrain, and the addition-by-subtraction principle for new health habits.

First and foremost, I acknowledge my role as a Curator: while I have my own media of creation, my online presence is largely committed to gathering resources that can rapidly expand the awareness of Seekers who are beginning to find their way through the miasma of modernity. You may think of a ‘curator’ as an art gallery manager or local Disc Jockey, and you would be correct … there is also a Latin root for the word that denotes guardianship or being a keeper of something valued. The treasure trove of lectures, podcasts, exercises, articles, videos, meditations, programs, etc. that I have compiled makes me feel like a bona fide Protector, not to conceal, but to parse out golden nuggets to those who have demonstrated their openness to Truth.

With this in mind, homage is due to the brilliant and brave personae who have been leading the charge toward new paradigms long before I started using the term ‘terrain.’ These noteworthy names include:

Dr. Barre Paul Lando; Alec Zeck; Josh & Adam Bigelsen; Eileen McKusick; Dr. Melissa Sell; Dr. Tom Cowan; Drs. Sam & Mark Bailey; Dr. Marizelle Arce; Jacob Diaz; Dr. Andrew Kaufman; Dr. Amandha Vollmer; Dawn Lester; Dr. Kelly Brogan; Daniel Roytas; Steve Falconer; Topher Gardner; and many more …

(If the above names are new to you, throw a dart anywhere on that proverbial map and enjoy a journey into their work.)

Dr. Harvey Bigelsen—champion of holographic blood and terrain practices—popularized the statement, “The terrain is all.” This calls to mind that, when speaking of THE Environment, we are referring to a complete accounting for EVERY THING in our locus of existence … so try not to get too overwhelmed by literally everything!

The word ‘environment’ itself can be broken down as follows:

‘Environ’ is a transitive verb, meaning ‘to surround, encircle’; ‘-ment’ is our English suffix to indicate a product, a condition, or a means. While usually conflated with the Latin root of mens as mind, the root mentum is more akin to a projecting edge, an architectural boundary. (Even the word ‘momentum’ connotes a singular impulse, a particular action started and continuing on its track …) For our purposes, my interpretation is that while we are deeply connected to our surrounding sphere of influence, we do indeed have a personal boundary: the dermis. This is why the layers of the skin play such a pivotal role in our reactions to the manifestation of symptoms. Speaking from experience, few things are as irritating as skin issues, wounds, blemishes, etc.

The concept of a defense-system biology—one which is constantly protecting us from harm, visible and invisible—is most markedly represented by the immune system. (I say “represented” to highlight the fact that it is modeled, so to speak, on many dynamic biological processes, yet there is no image, no thing we can remove or implant in the body as evidence of it.) Beyond germ theory and the purported novel illnesses that can kill you via a strong breeze (allegedly), does not make for a confident, strong body most days; the fear of “catching” something that your system may not be prepared for is already a state of Stress. The linguistic euphemisms that reveal this—e.g., “catching” a cold, “coming down” with something, and “having a diagnosis”—are shadows of Possession, being captured by something outside of you that has now penetrated your defenses.

The idea of the dermis as our doughty front-line centurion already leaves us more vulnerable than most animals: we walk and live upright, with our vital organs completely exposed - excepting clothing - to the world, lacking any protective hide or fur or tusks or talons to overtly protect ourselves. (Talk about vulnerability…) Yet we are told to rely on an invisible system that is tasked with denying entry to our personal space. Most people are violated or assailed every day by external toxins (air, water, light pollution), as often as they are choosing to poison themselves (alcohol, ultra-processed foods, pharmaceuticals, etc.). Such inundation would leave any immune system heavily taxed by these stressors. If we factor in images given to us such as “killer cells” that seek and destroy for your benefit, then this antagonistic dynamic one has with the environment seems to make for a frustrating life…

From the scientific perspective of German New Medicine, skin issues are indicative of separation or boundary conflicts. Generally speaking, GNM places particular emphasis on singular moments that have sustained impact on the body, as delineated in the 1st Biological Law of Nature The Conflict: “1st Criterion: Each Significant Biological Special Program (SBS) is formed by a biological conflict, a highly acute, dramatic, and isolative conflict-shock experience on three levels: psyche-brain-organ.” (Source: The Psychological Roots of Disease by Bjorn Eybl, p. 9, Digital) This premise has further been supported in some evolving cancer research, now acknowledging that the depth of root causes steeped in emotional and/or spiritual struggles has profound influence on tumor growth, spread, organ dysfunction etc. To link this back to the skin: physiologically, the skin is one of the body’s primary filtering mechanisms, as we both breathe through our skin (inhale + exhale) and also using the temperature sensations to appropriately retain warmth or sweat it out, sweat being a potent form of detox in its own way. (This is merely a first blush at sharing GNM, and I highly recommend you check out the link above to Dr. Melissa Sell’s playlist)

When we inhibit our terrain and its boundary with blocked emotions—and therefore, stymied qi or life-force energy—then the skin is often a locus of symptoms because it calls immediate attention to an issue. The most common form of “treatment” is suppression: to lather on substances or ingest intensive regimens of steroids or anti-somethings, all of which may produce the desired outcome of no more rashes or itches… but at what cost? To stuff something down, especially beneath the dynamic layers of the dermis, can become catastrophic when it meets with downstream effects of the blood, oxygen, and waste movement in the body.

How many signals are you receiving in a day? By that I mean: aside from your to-do list and your obligations and your goals and your responsibilities and your awareness of social-cultural-political phenomena and your relationships… are you conscious of how many aspects of your YOU-ness are constantly vying for your attention? Most likely not, and I speak once more from experience. It warrants a high level of discipline to be still and tune into that cacophony. And yet, on the biological level, our exposure to a staggering influx of signals from our environment puts us on the back foot most of the time, in a state of Reaction, constantly having to work within the confines of a fight-flight-freeze paradigm. I would also like to point out that the subtle signals of unattended conflicts or traumas occupy a fair amount of bandwidth whether we know it or not, and therefore are depleting the fertile ground of our terrain via constant disturbances of the vibrational field in our body.

Speaking of depleting the terrain: It has been said that any healthy person introducing a regimen of heavy pharmaceuticals usage into their diet would be seriously ill within the week. We can well imagine the level of dysfunction and dis-regulation of the poor souls who have been led down such path of dependence, and go willing at times, because of their dis-ease. And: The good news is our whole, beautiful biological composition is astoundingly resilient. Massive dividends can be reaped by removing things from our field instead of adding more supplements or types of food or practices … less is more, and subtracting negative influences is a massive boon to the pursuit of homeostasis.

THINK: of the “immune system” as an adaptable system of resilience and regeneration. The Terrain can describe a living, vital symbiosis of processes, systems, and experiences, from body to ego to soul and beyond. All-encompassing, yes … and for as much as we can invest our energy into, we support the body in its natural state of Ease. The Brilliance of the Body is amazingly consistent in keeping us upright, active, mobile, engaged, emotional, awake, asleep, regulated... predominantly beyond our front-of-mind consciousness.

e.g. Do you will yourself into breathing? do you activate your own blood moving? do you control the movement of your bowels? do you consciously awaken yourself from sleep?

Whatsoever we consider to be our preeminent process management system for all of this, the idea of “immunity” suggests more of a coherence that creates space for constancy in relationship to adaptability, instead of a prevention system (which seems porous, at best, despite all the vaccines, vitamins, bio-hacks etc.). By having a regulated nervous system, for instance, balancing our unique abilities to respond with relative ease to the challenges in life, we can then halt the vicious cycles of perpetual trauma on ourselves and others because we have a strong base from which to love, to act, to rest, to be.

For these reasons, I often posit the following to people: When you experience chronic, unresolved stress on any level, at least one of the following systems will likely shut down or become dis-regulated:

lymphatic (detox); musculoskeletal (posture, movement); circulatory (blood movement); respiratory (breathing); digestive (nutrient absorption); nervous (mind-body activity); endocrine (hormonal function); excretory (waste removal); reproductive (sexual health); or integumentary (collagen + heat).

So, which system would you like to live without for awhile?

That jarring, rhetorical question is the reality of the balancing act we call life. On the physical level, for example, an issue with the foot can cause massive issues for the knee, and therefore the hip, and therefore the pelvis, which not only houses sexual organs and the life-force therein, but is also the transfer station for upper body to lower body movements. Compensations for weakness or imbalances at any point in the holistic system of the skeleton will lead to chronic pain, which exacerbates stress, which compromises the organ functions, which shortens health-span … YOU GET IT!

There are myriad choices via action one can take in any moment to balance themselves in favor of a healthy Terrain. When I know better, I do better. My standards are my own, and they have been hard ones to hold myself accountable to at times. This is yet another aspect of the Ego-Body that is managed in favor of a truly sustainable vitality: am I bull-shitting myself on ANY LEVEL, which keeps me from being at pure ease … or am I on the straight and narrow to long health-span? This most beautiful philosophy of health that I accept has absolutely bolstered my inner gnosis of power, freedom, life and love, and feels like a good path to go walking upon for awhile.

If this has piqued your interest, I encourage you to visit theendofcovid.com for a bonafide masterclass on the paradigm shift that is currently taking place within the health-freedom community.

Now, health is usually unfairly coupled with the term “Fitness” in most circles, and if there is a distinction to be made in language, then permit me to do just that, as succinctly as possible …

It has been said that there is only One Health: that state of Being which is effortless, optimal, regenerative; ‘Fitness’ would be the ability to act, to perform tasks of the body, not only athletic but also functional and repetitive (e.g. there is a level of Fitness required to take one step after another for more than just a few minutes, which is called “Walking”, something the Fitness people have turned into a work-out instead of a meditative practice … more on this shortly). My position is that Health is the foundation for fitness and performance, and without a Holistic footing, performance and longevity will suffer.

At a fitness club the other day, I saw a CrossFitting young-ish man in top shape (‘shape’ being another fascinating euphemism for ‘health’) wearing a shirt emblazoned with the phrase: “Progress through Pain!” Read aloud, it sounds almost like a dystopian novel’s mantra for a political party, something akin to this:

It may come as no surprise to many of you that this is not a singular statement directing those who seek recognition as “healthy” people. “No Pain, No Gain” has dominated the philosophy of countless trainers, coaches, practitioners, gym-goers for decades now here in the States, to the staggering detriment of all involved. I have frequently pointed out that hard work does not beget more hard work, meaning: if one is constantly redlining - as we see in CrossFit, high-intensity-interval-training, runners, powerlifters, etc. - then burnout is only a few reps away… To conceive of our Energy stores as a battery warrants our commitment to re-charging the battery after we have drained it. Imagine trying to run a Zoom recording, internet browser with YouTube, email app, and a Pacman game on your computer right now, with 10% battery … odds are, there will be a crash and you will lose some if not all of your progress gained.

Weakness is commonly condemned as the culprit for pain, and so in conventional physical therapy, there is a dedicated effort to strengthen areas where the pain has presented itself. This is a case of “Yes, good, AND…” since there are two core tenets of biomotor ability that must be mastered to a degree before pursuing strength: posture and balance. There is a burgeoning theory that our Energy is greatly enhanced or diminished by the quality of our resource retention, especially water, as well as nutrients sourced from food, so that if our Bio-Battery is low, we are more vulnerable than ever to sickness, poor organ function, injury, and even death. Furthermore, the evolving field of study around Fascia has established the principle of non-locality, meaning that the locus of the pain is usually not the precise area that requires the most critical attention. This flies in the face of most allopathic and conventional treatment, which would slice open a person’s knee before ever considering the mobility of their feet, ankles, spine etc. That would necessitate patience - a luxury to some, and an uncharacteristic virtue of most people who are anxious to get back to work, gym, and “normal” life.

It is no secret that our modern habits have hamstrung our ability (literally, to the point of shortening our hamstrings) to practice natural posture and move with grace and comfort. When we then take our shortened hamstrings and hip flexors, rounded thoracic spines, slack jaws and immobile feet into a gym, we are asking too much of our posture - poor as it is - when we move under or with loads that rival much of what our ancestors were doing as part of their daily lives. This is not to say that we must avoid heavy and hard things; rather, we are called to embrace a holistic view of our anatomy in order to choose the movement programs that are best suited to our personal ability, health history, goals, etc. Otherwise, our structure cannot handle the influence of all the external and internal elements that we subject it to. When the body is viewed from the perspective of Tensegrity (Tension + Integrity), as coined by Buckminster Fuller and conceptualized for anatomy by Tom Myers, then the following seems more applicable to our experience: “Load a tensegrity, and it will distribute the strain around the whole structure. Ergo: Where will a strained compression (classical skeletal assumption) structure break? where the strain is greatest. Where will a tensegrity structure break under strain? At its weakest point.”

This set of circumstances opens the door to a visit from a guide that lays in wait, anxious to provide us with new wisdom: The Pain Teacher. This concept, as posited by my mentor-from-afar Paul Chek, edifies the Seeker to accept that any manifestation of injury, dis-ease, malady, setback etc. is meant to provide us with the rubric for inner assessment, to heal from within to without. If Pain signals to us progress or health or fitness or quality or satisfaction, that is a purely inner experience, one that has manifold implications for the organs, nervous system, limbic system, fascia web, and our own psyche. Pain is a variable experience, meaning it has a degree of feeling depending on our acknowledgement of it and anticipation of its presence. However, it is most clearly a sign that we are out of alignment, that we have neglected or negated our ability to function fully in harmony, and thus are directed to visit some part of our Self that is seeking pointed attention and intention to recover.

If this all sounds pedantic, please pardon me for such rudimentary musings… it is just that I feel these concepts are taken for granted and bypassed in favor of flattering our own Ego. As I write this, I am in the midst of another lecture from the Pain Teacher, and have been humbled to realize the contributing factors of my pain on the physical and mental/emotional levels (MUCH MORE on this another time, since that is the real gravy of this meal). My own Ego has commandeered the steering of my movement programs far too often, to the point of serious spinal injury that greatly hindered my capacity to breathe, move, think and feel - and that is no exaggeration. Such is the potency of Pain… So it is that the wisdom of the Pain Teacher reminds us to use our Heart to feel what we know. That is: to practice self-love, self-care that reifies our life-force energy, and to be gentler with our bodies so that they can steward us seamlessly throughout all of our days, months, years…

If these criticisms do not resonate with you, consider that so much of our collective experience is dedicated to the avoidance or dilution of pain: via distraction, intoxication, rejection, denial, suppression, with a host of substances and activities to aid in those pursuits of doing anything other than GETTING CURIOUS ABOUT THE PAIN. That is my paramount encouragement from writing all of this… that should you be visited by the Pain Teacher, submit with humility and open-mindedness to the challenge at hand, exploring the depths of the questions: how can I encourage my body to heal me from within to without?

In support of this, I am reminded of what a respected men’s coach once said, to the effect of: as an athlete, why would you think that your healing / rehab process is something other than Training? It is ALL related to our ability to perform, to express ourselves through movement, and not be doomed to repeat the tests given to us by the Pain Teacher ad nauseam with no wisdom earned. When we envision ourselves as Athletes in the broadest sense - that we rely on our bodies to perform to our very best in all that we endeavor to achieve and experience - then we become profoundly interested in the lifestyle practices that nourish and heal. In the inevitable times when stress and exertion mount and drain our batteries (Yang energy), we are further called to prioritize our rest and recovery (Yin energy) so that we can have a fluid relationship with that beautiful, timeless pursuit we call BALANCE.

Injury and dis-ease are processes, as healing and Health are processes … choose wisely, or the choice will be made for you. Take back full response-ability for your Vitality, and you will soar to new heights!

From the Best in Me to the Best in You,

Tom Foolery

O Muse! the causes and the crimes relate;
What goddess was provok’d, and whence her hate;
For what offence the Queen of Heav’n began
To persecute so brave, so just a man;
Involv’d his anxious life in endless cares,
Expos’d to wants, and hurried into wars!
Can heav’nly minds such high resentment show,
Or exercise their spite in human woe?

The Aeneid, Book I Verses 12-18

Since my *first* childhood - the second is now in effect - I have been moved by tales of chivalry, chaste love and valor, as typified in the classic stories of Parzival, Arthur and Lancelot, and many more. The current cache of our collective story-telling is now devoid of such characters, and as usual, this is by design.

While not considered contemporary, Tolkien’s The Lord of the Rings and The Hobbit bridged a massive gap in the literary myth-making of the modern epoch in a way that resounds throughout time and space, beyond harsh reality and into the realms of truly timeless legend. As I consider more deeply the traits on display in those books, I am once more inspired to raise my own standard of quality, both in entertainment and ethics.

I have realized the foundation for my preference of the L.O.T.R. series above Game of Thrones: my heart is enthralled by that brand of courage and morality; the former boasts in spades, and the latter lacking. G.O.T. discards any use of a moral compass - to say the least - and focuses its sights on gore, deception, lust and overarching animal tendencies that do not reflect the depth of the human story. This is not to say I don’t see the entertainment value in all that … still, I cannot help but observe the covert purpose of entertainment (read “enter — attain — mental”) to intrude upon the mind’s eye and grab hold of its attention. To what end? What does the saturation of grotesque emotional pulls have upon the collective consciousness? For one thing, it weakens the muscles of strong values such as courage, honor, integrity… chivalry even!

Chivalry is defined to represent knighthood, though as with most words, we interact with its symbolic interpretation, connoting lofty standards of chaste love, purity of character, defense of the defenseless, and all around commitment to the esteem of self and others in the spirit of Rightness. And for anyone who has seen a door flail in the face of elder woman of society with no young man to pause to hold it open on her behalf, the phrase “Chivalry is dead” likely sprung to mind, as further evidence that there once lived a popular comportment that no longer thrives among the strong and able who walk through doors.

For too long has the multi-media machine steamrolled over our gardens of imagination, projecting someone else’s designs into our organs of meaning-making, extracting any and all sense of quality from the majority of “stories” sold in the 20th century. So, as is my habit, I look backward, so see if there are any signposts that we missed along our way to the Present…

“Fantasy married with philosophy is a recipe for magic.” This formula was evident upon my re-reading of T.H. White’s classic novel, The Once and Future King. Although there is a consistent tenor of humor and cavalier syntax, there is a profound sense of meaning that lurks between the lines and behind the arbors of Sherwood Forest.

The plot - the tale of King Arthur, uniquely interpreted - harkens to a time of not taking ourselves too seriously, while still emphatically imparting timeless wisdom to the reader (without beating them over with lessons). Now this is hardly a book review, but a candid reflection of a certain luster that shines through the imagery of the character-interplay: chivalry lives on. Valor and vainglory coexisted famously, and yet there was still room left for a veracity of character made plain to the reader, either through the failings of the valiant Arthur or his dearest companion, Lancelot.

By superb serendipity, I chanced upon an amazing complement to T.H. White’s creation: The Mists of Avalon by Marion Zimmer Bradley. Portrayed mostly from the view of the feminine characters of the Arthurian Legend, this version points toward an abundance of esoteric, spiritual and human truths that heighten the potency of the drama that unfolds. Hardly exclusive to the male characters, the embattled personalities of Morgaine, Igraine, Viviane etc. also speak to the grey-areas of decision-making, wherein we are all invited to choose based on our principles or our desires… I highly recommend reading this novel to ignite a refreshed passion for exceptional explorations of our best stories!

Today, our deliberately misinformed, delusional impressions of chivalry are further obfuscated by the machinations of Hollyweird and modern narratives that do a disservice to the age of knights and heroes. To be fair, not all knights were heroes, as they took massive advantage of the feudal culture that afforded them tremendous tangible power over the purveyors of pitchforks and pottery who might dare to rise up against the iron-clad warrior on his horse… though that resistance was unlikely and futile. How then might we revisit this age of chivalry that seems to have lost its luster?

The hero’s journey, which has gained due reverence thanks to the resurgence of Joseph Campbell’s legacy (watch The Power of Myth) and work, has myriad archetypes to visit in our imagination, and as a young man who honors his eternal spirit of boyhood, I cannot help but think that the knight/prince/warrior/king roles are the most quixotic and admirable. However, I know that may not be a popular opinion… the current cultural clime is rife with tales of anti-heroes, or more likely, antipathy stories, completely devoid of any noble or uplifting messages.

There is a meme I have seen pop up that conveys the following truism: Women do not need men’s protection because they are helpless; they need it because they are important.

AMEN!

Why should such a sentiment be degraded by a misunderstanding and misinterpretation over gender roles, cultural corruption of polarity, and revisionist history… to me, it is truly a place of honor that a man can aspire to be the guardian, the protector of any and all women in his life.

Do we have stories of strong men protecting the women, children, elderly etc. out of a bonafide sense of duty and honor? Where are the archetypes of the Warrior-Magician-King-Lover present in today’s stories? Are we aware that, without these reflections of our higher selves, we are doomed to slide into the depths of dark debauchery for lack of light?

The creative sparks are catching tinder as we speak, I believe. An evolution of these elevating archetypes is being spurred by necessity, as people find themselves in the throes of their Hero’s/Heroine’s Journey. There is no better crucible than our present circumstance, considering this way or that, wondering if we turn back will life be the same as before, or if we go forward, will we perish… knowing all the while that the fabric of our character will be tested.

This is the stuff worth writing about, thinking about, talking about… and certainly, worth living about.

-- Richard Feynman

Before I developed an intolerance for the theater of Scientism, I was enamored with the simple and dynamic wit of Richard Feynman. Even now, I cannot throw the baby out with the bathwater, despite my suspicions around the Manhattan Project and the questionable nature of “theoretical physics” to which Feynman was committed.

That having been said, there are bastions of scientific glory that have made their mark thanks to grounded people like Feynman, and those standards shine through our current dark ages (what? we’re in the dark ages NOW?!) like distant candles down a corridor of unknown origin.

So, when I first considered podcasting, I felt the compulsion to lean into my penchant for asking intimate, personal, deliberate questions that originate in my genuine curiosity for deeper gnosis. One such question - rhetorically and often silently offered - was, “Who’s to say?” This innocuous query seemed to me as a promising platform from which to leap into the depths of our collective conditioning, especially around the rampant logical fallacy of ‘appeal to authority’.

It is far easier to ask “Who’s to blame?” than it is “Who’s to claim?” The claim - of ownership, response-ability, veracity, etc. - warrants a degree of maturity and honesty that the 70% of children-in-adult-bodies are fearful of embodying. I say that as someone with plenty of the Wounded Child archetype active in his experience, and recognizing (re-cognizing = perceiving again) those wounds that make me vulnerable to the Savior search. At the least, maintaining a constructive skepticism around sources makes for a refreshingly alert experience when we engage with matters of import, such as health and technology.

Sourcing is also a critical - and I would offer, the priority - element of evaluating nutritional needs. A pound of beef that was slaughtered and prepared in an environment of natural grazing, spacious living, and loving care is appreciably richer in vital energy than beef riddled with antibiotics, injected hormones and vaccines, and was raised in a densely-populated environ of stress and disease. To connect the thread further to this discussion of authority and information: it may interest you to learn that it was the pharma titan AstraZeneca who created Breast Cancer Awareness Month. This same corporation has circulated two “blockbuster” breast cancer drugs, begging the question: what “awareness” can be found if those promoting it are so heavily invested in a continuation of their treatment products? In a bygone time, this was known as a conflict of interest.

If we were to remain in the dark and have our choices for food heavily restricted by enforced ignorance, we would be rotting from within from the disempowering feeling of being force-fed dead food. The role of education is not dissimilar, in that we must wade through the muck and mire of real mis-information, half-truths and blatant lies that mar our path to Enlightenment. The access to wise sources is now largely unfettered; thought the champions of censorship have returned, there is little that stands in the way of a veracious appetite for truth.

The essence of my insatiable inquiry is not unfamiliar to most people who share a relentless skepticism for sources (hello, Virgos). Coincidentally, I was tickled to learn that the Fifth Agreement - a complement to the beautifully simple and profound Four Agreements authored by Don Miguel Ruiz - was stated as: “Be skeptical but learn to listen.” I cannot expound upon the precise teaching Ruiz offers, but my own read on that tenet would produce a further question: where do we focus our listening?

These quotations from the book might help point you and me in the right direction:

• “‘Be skeptical’ is masterful because it uses the power of doubt to discern the truth.”

• “Use the power of doubt to challenge every message that you deliver to yourself.”

The Biblical myth describes the brief tale of Thomas, one of Jesus’ twelve Apostles, as a cautionary vignette for skeptics. When Jesus returns to visit his followers, it is Thomas who insists on inspecting the wounds of Christ with his own hands and eyes, to verify the presence of his Teacher and to quell his disbelief. The tenor of this story in most Catholic churches - in my experience - was to chastise those incredulous individuals who demand evidence for their faith, thus earning the moniker “Doubting Thomas”.

It was this post-Easter story that moved my parents to name me Thomas. Scanning the pages of my life’s story, I regret that I was not more deserving of this name, as I find myself wanting for the stores of skepticism that would have aided my mental and spiritual growth… instead, it required the pain and conflict of the Plandemic to ignite within my soul a flame of relentless curiosity, for which I am immensely thankful.

Now, I find the tale of Thomas (‘Didymus’, Greek origin for ‘twin’) to be inspiring and honest. Why are we expected to have blind faith? Why are we mocked for asking questions? Why are we denounced for challenging fables and fictions? Is there no place for the Doubting-Thomases of the world to seek out veracity in this age of revisionist history and dogma?

As the legend of Jesus delivered the esoteric lesson that “The Kingdom of Heaven is within you”, it stands as a compelling challenge to constantly evaluate our intuition as a stronghold of our Kingdom. If we were to “challenge every message that you deliver to yourself”, I believe we would foster a heart-centered system of perception that would liberate us from the confusion that characterizes our age of information-overload. The brain, after all, is not the master operator we conceive it to be; it has its two hemispheres to balance out our impression of our situation, to centralize our reactions, but it fails to guide us properly in matters of the Soul, our Truest Self. Only the heart, with its unique sensory properties, can provide the wisdom we crave.

It occurs to me in writing this piece that Doubt is most certainly a double-edged sword: one edge can cut through the pollution of propaganda and deception, while the other can wound our ability to trust and perceive clearly. Universal capital-T Truth is hardly accessible to us in this existence, so long as we concede victory to materialism and ego. Thankfully, we are granted choices all the live long day as to where and how we will commit our life-force energy.

There is a saying, attributed to Paramahansa Yogananda: “God is simple. Everything else is complex. Do not seek absolute values in the relative world of Nature.” I can live by that most of the time, reveling in the mystery that surrounds me, not clinging to what I think I know (“think I know” is such an aptly vague way to say it). And, like a sword that is only useful to one who knows how to wield it, I can employ Doubt to clear the dross from the hidden gems of this time…

Of the numerous perks to playing The Fool, I enjoy the privilege and pleasure of staring into the face of any king, queen, prince, princess, judge, juror, etc., and responding to their unfounded superiority with a smile, and a simple question: “Who’s to say?”

— from ‘The Man Watching’ by Rainer Maria Rilke

I was in a fight at the start of 2024: at odds with myself and my dreams, and taking that fight into my relations and responsibilities with consternation. It certainly seemed to be a daunting tussle, especially when it felt as though I had to grind through my circumstance… until I stumbled upon a new path, that led me up and over the mounting obstacle I once thought to be insurmountable.

At first blush, the opportunity to join a “men’s group” (the quotation marks denoting a platitude that does not aptly describe the container) seemed trivial and indulgent, especially given what I considered to be better uses of my time and money. And yet, it dawned at me that such mental resistance was a trigger worth investigating. So I leaned in, thanks to the advocacy of Jared Pickard, proprietor of BE HERE Farm + Nature.

If you’re not familiar with Jared Pickard and his journey, I will happily direct you to some podcasts that cover his saga. For now, suffice it to say that while I was acquainted with his story, I was not prepared for his inviting, inclusive and inquisitive nature that would become the catalyst for my emphatic ‘YES!’ to join his BE HERE MAN container (“BHM” from here on out). The on-boarding call alone - thirty minutes of jovial discourse, smattered with some seriousness - was nudging me closer to diving headlong into a new realm of spiritual and personal growth. Jared’s presence conveyed a dedication to service that he embodies so well as part of his Dream-Line, a concept explored by holistic master Paul Chek, who has directly influenced Jared and guided me from afar in turn.

As it turned out, Paul Chek was one of the ‘Visiting Masters’ of the program, which featured a roster of bonafide badasses: Paul, Laird Hamilton, Alex Grey, Cal Callahan, Eben Britton and Jason Pickard. Most of those names were familiar to me, and that aspect of BHM became a keen attraction to joining the program, as the access to those men was worth waaaaaaaay more than our relatively nominal fee for twelve weeks of self-development. I was further intrigued by the special sessions we were offered with ‘Visiting Teachers’, educating us on a variety of skillsets, from psycho-somatic practices to breath-work to singing, etc. Such eclectic and intimate connections were supremely interesting to me, and yet, they were only the tip of the iceberg…

The other pillar of the container that would ground our experience was the curriculum based on the self-mastery principles as explored by the inimitable Rudolf Steiner. (NB: Steiner is especially hard to typify and describe, so I beseech anyone unfamiliar with his influence to visit the link above and dip a toe or ten into the timeless waters of his works.)

My relationship with Steiner’s work was burgeoning into a precursory grasp of such principles as “supersensible knowledge”, “spiritual / occult science”, “the philosophy of Freedom”, etc. My imagination was ensnared by this Mystic and his loquacious presentations of his perspective, though I had to admit I was barely a novice. Thankfully, with my education in its fledgling phase, this seemed a particularly advantageous time to make a leap into a distillation of Steiner that would serve my greatest project: My Self.

After making my commitment, I anxiously awaited the commencement of our first Thursday-night sessions. At 8:00 PM my time, it was a bit of a chore (at first) to summon the attention and energy on those dark and chilled February evenings, when I was developing a bio-circadian rhythm that was grooving me toward a consisent early bedtime. NO MATTER … there was work (and play) to be done, regardless of the timing.

From the jump, there was hardly a scarcity for enthusiasm and energy, as the majority of men were keen to shed the dross the encumbers most of our encounters and launch themselves into the depths of genuine connection and open discourse. This was precisely what I sought, too, and I let my desire for that level of openness echo through each opportunity that presented itself for collaboration.

Our template, though fluid, was structured to follow a sequence that grounded us in reverence - through prayer or meditation - before leaning into one-on-one chats that expanded into group discourse. The virtual medium for our gatherings were no excuse for avoiding intimate connection; if anything, it enhanced our ability to deeply listen and respond to the essence of what any man shared or offered. This Sacred Listening was encouraged gently and seamlessly by our leaders, Jared and Edmund Knighton, and consequently honored by each and every member. On the special evenings when a Visiting Master was scheduled, we plied the use of our two listening organs to consume the special brand of wisdom offered by these bonafide models of Masculinity.

The man I had the least knowledge of was the peerless artist, Alex Grey. (Watch: The Chapel of Sacred Mirrors on YouTube) I was quickly drawn to his expansive way of speaking, augmented on our screens by a stunning background of his own creation:

At the conclusion of his tête à tête with Jared, I was compelled to seek his insight as to why, in contrast with the new-age dismissal of the Body, he expressed the sanctity of the human form in his work? And while I am not at liberty to reveal the secrets of our inner room, I can say that his honesty was refreshing and appreciated deeply.

Countless highlights adorn my memory of those twelve weeks, which featured nearly thirty sessions of Practice, in the sense that they required my best attention, commitment and relaxation skills. We call this stuff “The Great Work”, when really, it is “The Great Play”, because what we did all along the way was laugh and jest and cry and test and explore and wonder… all the while, molding ourselves into a new form that we could show our World.

Beyond those sessions, I was inspired daily to weave the meditation and embodiment practices into my life. As I greeted the Sun in my back yard, I would employ the walking exercises that not only energized my body, but also awakened my Spirit to meet the day with an alertness I cannot say I have every experienced before. One particularly enriching cue from Steiner (as relayed by Edmund) was to spend at least thirty to sixty seconds in silent reflection upon completing these exercises, lest the magic of the moment be forsaken to the whirlwind of the day’s busy-ness. That reminder alone was one that I come back to time and again, aiding me in my commitment to slowing down my heart, my mind, and my sense of impatience, all in favor of imbuing my moments with a rich Spirit-Sense that I enact with my energy.

The fruits of this experience were bountiful, with one unexpected variety appearing in the garden of our container: I found new friendships of import and impact. The Brother-Ship - as coined by my man, Matthew Koman (our conversation on EP 65) - transported me to a land of confidence, wherein I realized that, despite the distance between us all, my optimism in the leading forces of Men in the world was renewed, because I found other strong, spiritual brothers walking similar paths home to themselves. Admittedly, I had been feeling isolated due to my rapid sense of growth the last few years, and that disconnection was draining my inner resources… perfect-timing found me yet again, and just in time.

I am certain that the lessons of BHM will populate my musings for a long time, and so I do not feel rushed to contain them all in this first installment. But if you’ve read this far, perhaps I owe you an explanation as to why I chose that stanza from Rilke to reel you into this essay…

My own fondness for Rilke’s poetry was bolstered by the frequent inclusions in our bi-weekly documents produced by Edmund and Jared, which seemed to me as ideal complements to the work in which we engaged. The lines above from ‘The Man Watching’ were delivered live and verbatim by Edmund on one of our memorable calls, and so I scoured the internet to find the poem and digest it for myself.

What I found then and now was a resonance with that sentiment of surrender, giving up the fight in favor of those forces that conspire with me. Included in that direction is the releasing of our desire to name and dissect each and every thing we encounter… as someone who had depended too heavily on his left-brain for too long, this was a refreshing draught to drink. The boon of those twelve-weeks invested in My Self was a resounding “Aaaaaaahhhhhh” from my Inner Being, exhaling the pressure and expectation that was an obnoxious traveling companion on my way. The inhale that followed was an invitation for new partners on the path, some of which I now knew had faces and names, and others were just beginning to reveal their presence to me.

There are real fights in life, to be sure, though I haven’t started on in awhile. In the meantime, my preference for peace and equanimity has helped me carry me on the currents of this river I am in, minimizing my flailing in favor of floating.

I am immensely grateful for the lessons and skills accrued in BE HERE Man, all of which I wield on behalf of my Soul, so that I may continue the Hero’s Journey of my own design.

To Jared, Edmund, my friends and brothers, who wordlessly request the best of me; to Jordan, who reflected to me the progress made in this time with her support and encouragement: I honor each of you with my thanks and love.